Honestly, this is one of the best articles I've read on Medium. When my mum died suddenly, people either didn't know what they say, wanted to know all the juicy details of her sudden passing (this was in Ireland so I wasn't surprised) or they said something unhelpful. However, there were three things said to me that may seem odd to some, but helped. One was advice to 'accept hugs'. That was from my sister. 'Hugs are like medicine. Accept them.' Mum had a huge funeral (again, Ireland) and the amount of hugs that I received that day were amazing. I wondered why the priest advised me to take off the rings on my right hand but by the end of the funeral, I realised it was because they would ache from being shook all day. Another thing someone said was 'She got the death we all wanted,' which I wouldn't advise anyone to say but it actually helped me. Mum used to always say that she 'wanted to go out like a light,' and she did. Thirdly, I spoke to another lady who had lost her own mother. 'Three years,' she told me. 'It took three years for the pain to ease.' That actually helped a lot, as they weren't telling me to get over it overnight. Having that three year time period in mind gave me hope that the pain wouldn't always be so intense. This has turned out to be a long response so I'll stop here. I just wanted to thank you so much for sharing it.